Andrea (adgam_ga) wrote in longing2bemommy,
Andrea
adgam_ga
longing2bemommy

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Mommy's arms are empty...


Today would have been my baby's due date, had I not miscarried last June. I'm feeling very sad and "alone" today...



Today is the due date
For you to be born.
But all I have is
An emptiness to mourn.

Mommy's arms are empty
With no baby to hold.
My heart feels heavy.
The weather is cold.

This should have been the time
For the anticipation of your arrival.
But no one seems to be remembering
To share in my grief or sorrow.

You were a life
Created from love.
You were a gift
That was sent from above.

But Mommy's arms are empty
With no baby to hold.
My heart feels heavy.
The weather is cold.

Your nursery is still the computer room.
The bassinet lent from your cousins is still in a box.
Your pooh-bear blankies remain folded
With tiny baby clothes and your cute little socks.

There isn't a day that goes by
When I haven't thought of you.
Calculating how far along my pregnancy would be
Or how big my tummy would be getting, too.

But Mommy's arms are empty
With no baby to hold.
My heart feels heavy.
The weather is cold.

I know that you have gone
To a much better place.
Knowing that the grace of God
Is shining on your face.

I see another baby.
I think of you then, too.
Wondering what you'd have looked like
As you giggle, cry, and coo.

But I will never know these things
Because you will never be here.
But in my heart you'll always be
My baby, my angel, my dear.

It doesn't make it easier.
For the pain I have is still here.
I will never forget you, my little one.
That fact remains quite clear.

But Mommy's arms are empty
With no baby to hold.
My heart feels heavy.
The weather is still cold.
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  • 5 comments
Oh, honey.... :'(

I know where you are coming from. Our first was supposed to be March 18th of this year and the last was supposed to be May 15th.

That poem hit so close to home. You summed up all of my upcoming fears.

At least we know that we are not alone.

I will pray for you to get through this tough time. I will pray for you to receive the blessed gift of a child.

I am behind you 100%.

hugs

Thank you for the understanding and encouraging words... they truly help a lot.

Also, thank you for the prayers. I know with them, and with the support of friends such as you, that I will get through this difficult time and then hopefully the day will come when I too will finally hold my own child in my arms.

I will pray for you too. We'll get through this together. Keep strong and have faith.

Hugs!
I empathize with you, though I know that doesnt mean much. Doesnt change much. That was beautiful and moving and i just wanted to let you know that to good people, come good things. All will be well, I know from experience how redundant that saying is, but inevitably is true. Be well.
-Augusta
Don't say your words don't mean much... because actually to know someone empathizes with you and knows where you're coming from means everything. I thank you for letting me know you feel for me, for your kind words and for your encouragement. I too believe that someday -- with encouragement from friends, compassion, and prayers -- good things will come to all of us.
God bless...

-- Andrea
Unlike you all, I don't have that courage. I keep my pain persoanl and private, knowing full well, the good it would do to talk to people. I fought myself for a long time, thinking myself less a person, less a woman; angry at the world feeling like someone had took away my God giving right to reproduce. I think I am more at peace now, then ever and Im okay. Im not usually a very sympathetic or caring person, much to my dismay but seeing you all, knowing you feel what I feel just makes me want to embrace you all. Be well.
-Augusta